Monday, January 10, 2011

Chore Charts

My dream:

I keep putting off getting organized with the kids.
I said I would make chore charts over Christmas vacation
-that didn't happen.
I am conflicted on how to set it up.
Do I switch chores around- do I keep them the same for each child, each week?
Do I pay them?
Do I offer a prize?
I love my kids and I strive to be a "good" mom.
But, my well meaning-actions seem to be causing me to do everything and
the kids not learning much on how to pitch in or how to just take care of themselves.
My middle 2 will probably thrive on having a chart that gets checked off everyday.
But what about the little guy?
Is he too young for chores?
I thought about immediately buying charts on etsy, but realized I should make them myself.
I have before and once we stopped following it, I stored it behind the couch (like any hoarder would do!)
Then I finally chucked it- I couldn't stand looking at it- it seemed like a constant reminder that I am not organized with the kids' chores.
When they come home from school, I feel bad they are tired, when we are enjoying the weekend, I feel like they need the break.

What do you do in your household?
Got any ideas?
Any links to someone who has a handle on this?
Let me know- I am interested!

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  1. Oh wow! I wouldn't even know where to begin on this's again, that fine line of walking on the balance beam between taking care of them, and teaching them to take care of themselves..of doing things for them..and showing them how to do things...of wanting to give them everything..and preparing them to be able to give themselves everything...

    I'm convinced that being a parent and finding that balance between being lax and strict is one of the hardest in the world! Goodluck!

    Perhaps you could explain to the kids why it's necessary and then work WITH them to create a chart? Again, goodluck!!

  2. After trying several different systems, I think we have finally found one that works. We have been using "chore packs" for almost a year. On seperate index cards I have written all the chores the kids can do.....empty dishwasher (I moved all our most used dishes to kid level), feed the dog, pick-up party the playroom, put away their laundry....then in the afternoon, I pick out what chores need to be done that day and put them into "packs" (envelope type thingys from Target) stuck to the wall in our pantry. When the kids get home from school they get a few minutes for snack and then it's "chore pack time". When they are done, the rest of the evening is playtime. I also include some things that aren't really "chores" (homework, shower, etc) and some fun stuff too (get the mail, enjoy your day off, etc). We don't "reward" the kids for their chores...if they fuss about emptying the dishwasher, I just remind them that the eat too. We do, however , give them an allowance at the beginng of each month. One dollar for each year.....$5 for the 5 year old, $7 for the 7 year old, etc....The "deal" with the allowance is that we don't buy toys anymore (except at bithdays and special occasions, of course). So if they want something at Target they bring their own money.

    Wow! That got wordy.....I thought our system was simple until I wrote it down....oh well, it works for us and I guess that is the bottom line. Whatever works for your family. Good Luck!

  3. Love those charts where did they come from? Are those the etsy ones?

  4. I love the book "Managers of Their Chores" by Steve and Teri Maxwell. It gives you everything needed to come up with a whole system, including chore packs. It walks you through each step. Great resource for sure.
    I don't do allowance for chores. I want them to contribute to our household just because they are part of the family. A lot of times kids are taught to expect rewards for doing things when they should just be doing them because it is the right thing to do. Just my opinion :)

  5. Love how organized your charts look on your refrigerator!
    The boys have their everyday chores that they do each and every day right after breakfast. Throughout the day I have them help me with things although I am noticing that I tend to just do things myself that I should be making them do. I'm trying to do better with that. They also are required to pick up after themselves throughout the day. I don't give allowences. If they want money they are required to find a way to earn it and it has to be something that they would not be doing anyways. I don't pay for household chores. Like Theresa, the boys do chores because they are part of the family and it's their responsibility to contribute to the family.

  6. I'm probably the wrong person to ask. I am SO bad about being consistent with things like chore charts. It's a great idea...and my kids always respond well when I try to initiate things like this. I'm usually the one who drops the ball in not keeping up with it.

    My boys do have certain chores they are responsible for though. They (collectively) are responsible for feeding the chickens and collecting eggs, setting and clearing the table, they are supposed to feed the dog and the cat, and they are supposed to put their dirty clothes in the hamper and their pj's under their pillows.

    I feel like it's time to add in some more responsibilities...and be more consistent with the responsibilities they do have.
    I want to raise young men who are capable of completing household chores.

    So.... I'll be watching the comments section here closely.

  7. P.S. - I just read the other comments. I really like Raelynn's idea. That kind of system might be right up my alley. The chores that need done change sometimes. And, the idea that the kids come home and check their chore packs almost makes it sound fun!

  8. IM writing about that tomorrow on my as Gapgirl post....

  9. DF- yes it is hard, finding the balance and you are right about me asking the kids- I thought about that becuase they are the ones asking for a chart.
    Rae- I really like your answer and will use some of it- thanks.
    Pink- I just pulled that off of google images- lol
    Theresa- I am laughing because as I read your post I remembered you told me about that book before so I must of wrote about this before and I should probablly just buy the book. lol
    Jen-lol- that is not my fridge- just my dream fridge- in fact my fridge looks like an apartment sized fridge from the 80s. That is my dream fridge complete with dream charts. I think you guys are right about no allowance.
    AHHH Karen- my kindred spirit- we are the same. I always drop the ball too- but I am currently on my resolution kick and want to do a chart and think I will stick with it- funny I haven't gotten on the treadmill yet though- I guess those 50 pounds will just metlt off? :)
    Gapgirl- waiting for your post- hope you got answers.


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